November 28, 2018

3 Reasons Why Sleeping Apart Can Actually Strengthen Your Relationship

Some couples experience the need or desire to sleep in a separate bed from their spouse. Maybe one of them has restless leg syndrome or […]

By Annie Wright|Relationship

Some couples experience the need or desire to sleep in a separate bed from their spouse.

Maybe one of them has restless leg syndrome or sleep apnea, or perhaps one is a bed and blanket hog, or a violently-loud snorer that keeps one partner awake at night.

Or, perhaps you simply just want to sleep apart because you LIKE to.

Whatever the reason, many couples face this quandary: do we sleep apart or not?

Many couples – or sometimes one partner within the couple – are reluctant to consider this or bring it up with each other for fear of the perceived stigma around what it means to sleep apart from one another.

As a therapist, I actually think there are multiple, notable benefits that come from choosing to sleep apart from your spouse that can directly benefit your mental health.

In today’s post, I want to share three reasons why sleeping apart can actually strengthen your relationship.

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1) Better sleep!

First and foremost is the possibility that, if you sleep apart, one or both of you will get a better night of rest.

And being well rested has a massive impact on your overall well-being and specifically your mental health resilience.

When we are sleep deprived, our susceptibility to stress, anxiety, and depression is greater.

Getting a good night of rest is critical to your mental health so if it means needing to sleep apart to do so, that’s a wise choice to make!

2) More control over your time and space.

In a hyper-busy world, sleeping apart in separate bedrooms offers couples the opportunity to have more time and control over their space and sleeping/rising routines.

If you have two partners with different temperature, environment, and/or schedule preferences, not only can this contribute to lack of sleep, but it can also feel, in some ways, like a burden to accommodate the other constantly.

By sleeping apart, you can regain some control over how you like to structure your time and space which, in turn, can boost your sense of happiness and well-being.

3) Less relational conflict.

If you’re choosing to sleep apart in order to get better sleep and/or accommodate one another’s various preferences, there’s a greater chance that you can reduce the amount of relational conflict you might otherwise experience if you’re constantly sleep deprived and/or feeling resentful for not being able to sleep and wake in the way you’d like.

And if there’s less conflict and more harmony in your relationship, it’s likely that you’re going to experience the positive mental health benefits that can come from feeling close and connected to your partner.

Can you think of another reason why sleeping apart can actually help strengthen your relationship? Have you found this to be true yourself? Leave a message in the comments below – we would love to hear from you!

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